4.07 am.
Insomnia
Couldn't sleep...Maybe of caffeine!
Recently, one of my friend asked me a question
" How to keep warm of a relationship?"
I din't answer her since I think I'm not a good lover.
and also thank you because your question helped me reflect on myself too
Relationship is the
universal challenge that provides opportunities for learning to everyone who has
been born. From birth to death no one can escape that challenge. Some of
us find it pleasurable. Some give up. There is no definite answer on how to
build a perfect relationship. But, for sure a good relationship will bring happiness
in your life
Many of you might not
know that I'm in a long distance relationship with a guy whose name is Seang . =)
My friends always ask me
the same questions.
·
" How do you keep
in touch ?"
·
" Have you ever
think of give up?"
·
" How are you
managing this relationship? "
·
" Aren’t you worried that he
might also have another relationship over there?"
If I tell you I never
worry about all the above, I am surely lying.
I'm here in Malaysia and
he has been studying in Sydney since
2010. The distance between Malaysia to Sydney is 6,669 km.
How good if Doremon exists
in this world so that he can bring him
to me and the blink of the eye!!!
Anyway, I do have some
principles that I follow. For me, to
maintain a long distance relationships you will need the following:
·
Love
·
Trust
·
Belief
·
Patience
( * and also a smart
phone, LOL)
It is difficult but that
doesn't mean these are impossible.
Let me elaborate:
1 . Communicate everyday
Since you won't be
seeing each other, it's important to establish and maintain an emotional
connection. It is not necessary to have long or in-depth conversations.You can tell
each other about your little triumphs and tragedies.
We never skip our
morning and night greeting since the beginning of our relationship 8 years ago
" Good
morning dear"
A simple short message
from him can made me cheer up the whole morning
" Good
night"
No matter how tired we
are, maybe we are in a fight or argument.
*Sometimes, when I'm in
a bad mood or angry
" Goodnight and bye!"
hehehehe
2 Get to know each other
Just like any
relationship, you'll have to spend some time really getting to know and
understanding your partner.
Take note of things they
enjoy the most
Do a little research on
it so you can have more common topics.
For example, if your
partner is a coffee lover
So, you should plan a date
in a café with a romantic ambience.
*If you need suggestions
on t great cafes in Alor Setar, you can refer to my previous posts
I know he likes
- Eating (common
interest with me)
- Remote Controlled Cars
/ Tool o car/ Accessories ( Tamiya)
- Calculation (I'm week
in this part)
- Playing the Piano
- To mind his own business
- ME!!
3 Support each other
We need support from
others to build up our confidence .
If your partner is ever
in a trouble, or hurt, or sad,
be there for them.
,
your words, your action would
mentally support him or her.
He is definitely my soul
mate,
I don't know how to
write in words...he can sense my feeling everytime even when I'm silent.
4 Celebration
Valentine, “Monthsary”,
Birthday, Special Day
How to celebrate without
him or her?
Hello, use your
creativity!
If you have a good
voice, you can record a love song for your partner.
Collect the photos of
both of you and create an electronic
album
Choose a present and
wrap it nicely and send it to her/ him
I feel lucky to have a
boyfriend who always surprises me
Each month on the 25th we will remind each other of our
monthsary =)
5 Create trust
Try your best to be
faithful.
You can be best friends
with others but you must know your limits
Avoid putting yourself
in situation where you would be tempted and let your partner know that there's
nothing to worry about.
Don't be too anxious or
jealous of what your partner does.
A little space is
harmless and will definitely keep things
calm.
Well, I sometimes don't trust him
Luckily he always
patiently explains to me and also I'm so
forgetful. LOL
6 Talk about the future
together
Assuming that ultimately
you'd want to live together,
discussing how're you
going to get to the point will help you prove to each other that the
relationship always continues
- Figure out who is
moving so that you can be together in future
- Decide a reasonable
target time to move
- Plan long-term finances.
We talk about our future
too.
Some of my best friends have
asked
"Hey, when are you
gonna marry Seang?"
I said around age of 29/30
I like to talk to him
about our future
we will only make
concrete plans when we are more stable in our careers.
7 Visit Often
Try to visit each other
as often as possible or as often as your budget permits.
A relationship cannot
thrive if the only thing you have is the phone call.
You need to see each
other in person at every opportunity.
Visit regularly if possible
=)
We used to visit each
other during the holidays.
He came to Kedah to
experience the different lifestyle here, unexpectedly he loves it here
I went to Australia to check out whether he got another
relationship or not (just kidding)
No doubt, I liked Sydney
=)
We also meet at our hometown.
We have the same hometown luckily.
Sometimes, we have no
plan for anything
So we end up watching dramas, cooking, playing the piano etc.
We love to travel. Every
December, we travel to a new place.
Going to places where nobody knows us, and choosing romantic restaurants to have dinner,
Walking together by the sea or just about anything
else we can do together
Love is patient and
kind;
love does not envy or
boast;
it is not arrogant or
rude.
It does not insist on
its own way;
it is not irritable or
resentful;
it does not rejoice at
wrong doing, but rejoice with the truth.
Love bears all things,
believes all things,
hopes all things,
endures all things.
By : Chouyunviviantan
